|
| Monday, July 31, 2006 |
| Makes it come faster |
(Woman pushes already lit elevator button.)
Crazy Guy: "I just pushed the damn elevator button. Do you think my push gave the thing AIDS?"
- Merchandise Mart
-- Submitted by Lagro |
posted by Ziggy @ 8:19 AM   Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
|
| This isn't the South |
Bartender: "We're going to get that new Deer Hunter video game. Shooting deer with a beer in your hand; what could be more American than that?"
Aussie Patron: "Driving a NASCAR at the same time."
- Wrigleyville
-- Submitted by Bated Breath |
| posted by Ziggy @ 8:17 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
|
| Where drinks are free! |
First Grader: "I'm going to write about my vacation!"
Friend: "Where did you guys go?"
First Grader: "Pepsicola, Florida."
- Elementary School on the South Side
--Submitted by First Grade Teacher |
| posted by Ziggy @ 8:13 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
| Friday, July 28, 2006 |
| Gross |
(Walking out of washroom)
Suit: "Why do you keep using the handicapped button to open the damn bathroom door?!"
Button pusher: "I'm not touching that door handle!"
Suit: "Why not? You didn't wash your fucking hands anyway! Now you've contaminated the button as well as the handle!"
- Sears Tower
-- Submitted by Lou the Jew |
| posted by Ziggy @ 8:28 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
|
| Dr. 60609? |
Girl: (on cell) "...and I saw it on TV, so I tried it. Can I tell you how excited I was that my boobs were finally the same size? I can totally show them off now!!!"
- Michigan Ave.
-- Submitted by Warrior |
| posted by Ziggy @ 8:12 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
|
| Must be a "wait" limit, too. |
(Guy tries to get off the elevator, but a rush of people block the exit.)
Guy: "Why is it that every fucking time I try to get off an elevator, you fat slobs can't wait three seconds to push your way on? Do I look like a freaking shadow? Am I paper thin enough to go through your elephant army? Last one in busts the weight limit!!!!! Assholes."
- Leo Burnette Building
-- Submitted by Goober |
| posted by Ziggy @ 8:08 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
| Thursday, July 27, 2006 |
| Stinky love. |
(Woman stands up to go to the bathroom)
Woman: (whispers) "Honey, slip me the paper."
Man: "For what? I'm reading!"
Woman: "I need to go to the bathroom."
Man: "You going to apologize to everyone before you stink the place up or after?"
- Intelligensia Downtown
-- Submitted by Brinn |
| posted by Ziggy @ 8:24 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
|
| Or someone with a slanty face |
Conductor: "This guy just came up to me and told me he found these glasses. He goes 'I think I stepped on them.' (Holds up bent glasses.) I tell him 'No you didn't. They just belong to the elephant man."
- Metra to Union Station
-- Submitted by Villi |
| posted by Ziggy @ 8:23 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
|
| Chicago is friendly |
"Special" Guy: (pushing people) "Excuse me! Excuse me! This door is occupied! Everyone stand back!"
Angry Lady: "Not today, asshole!"
"Special" Guy: "OCCUPIED! OCCUPIED! THIS DOOR IS OCCUPIED! MOVE BACK!"
Angry Lady: "No, retard! I ain't goin' anywhere! You push me around every damn morning and I'm getting tired of it. You push me one more damn time and I'm going to tear you apart and feed you to the pigeons!"
- Purple Line
-- Submitted by Chuck |
| posted by Ziggy @ 8:06 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
| Wednesday, July 26, 2006 |
| So she's a bitch? |
Dude: (on cell) "...yeah, and the problem is you're a bitch. You have bitch fingers, bitch hands, bitch arms, a bitch face, a bitch body, bitch legs, and bitch knees. You have bitch blood running through your god damn bitch veins. STOP CALLING ME!"
- Brown Line
-- Submitted by Staph |
| posted by Ziggy @ 7:42 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
|
| So why are you yelling? |
Girl: (on cell) "Damn it Mom! I can't BELIEVE you told them that! It's an open case, I still have to go to court! Everyone doesn't need to know that I was arrested! Don't tell them!" (pause) "It was when I went up to the school! Yeah, they arrested me at the school! NOT EVERYONE NEEDS TO KNOW THAT!"
- Jewel in Lisle
-- Submitted by DRSF Rich |
| posted by Ziggy @ 7:40 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
|
| "Not kill 12 million people...." |
One businessman to another: "...that's what Hitler should have done."
- North Michigan Ave.
-- Submitted by Jess |
| posted by Ziggy @ 7:38 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
| Tuesday, July 25, 2006 |
| Chestilicious |
Woman: (on cell) "I'm telling you, Marie, he had a chest to die for. Nice pecs, great definition. (slight moan) Ohhhh, I could chomp on those things like they were a bucket of buffalo wings."
- Metra
-- Submitted by Fantastico! |
| posted by Ziggy @ 7:34 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
|
| Definitely not a Corleone |
Guy: "...I just need to do something that will really get her attention. She went too far this time."
Friend: "Let it go."
Guy: "No, no, no. I have an idea. Do you think I could do that horse's head thing from The Godfather? She really loves her hamster, and it would probably have the same effect."
- Northbrook Starbucks
-- Submitted by Bark |
| posted by Ziggy @ 7:22 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
|
| Must have skipped "big hand, little hand" in school. |
Guy: (relentlessly searching his pockets and bag) "I can't find my phone. What time is it?"
Woman: (points to clock on wall) "There's a clock right there."
Guy: "I can't read that analog shit!"
- Oakton/Skokie Blvd. Walgreens, Skokie
-- Submitted by Colleen |
| posted by Ziggy @ 7:15 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
| Monday, July 24, 2006 |
| The cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems. |
College Dude #1: "Oh man. I think I'm getting the shakes." (holds out shakey hand)
College Dude #2: "Well , have you been drinkin' lately?"
College Dude #1: "No, man. I haven't had a drink in like 2 weeks."
College Dude #2: "Well there you go, you idiot."
- Red Line
-- Submitted by Mike Router |
| posted by Ziggy @ 7:15 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
|
| Odoriferous emanation. |
Guy: "..and we wake up in the morning, shower, clean up, put the baby powder on the crotch and we're out the door. I'm telling you, man: You cram into that metro and it gets so hot, the baby powder turns into freakin' glue. I might as well have washed with limburger cheese."
- Prudential Building
-- Submitted by Ron |
| posted by Ziggy @ 7:11 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
|
| Valid question |
Homey #1: "What up, Money!!!"
Homey #2: "What uuuuup, Moneeeey!!!"
Clueless Friend: "If you're both 'Money,' how do you know who is who?"
- UIC
-- Submitted by Yipsy |
| posted by Ziggy @ 7:08 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
| Friday, July 21, 2006 |
| Uh...Police? |
Man: (on cell) "I swear to GOD! If we don't hang out tomorrow night, I will cut you. (pause) Horseshit! I will rip out your liver and make you eat it while I feast on your heart. (pause) Good choice. 9PM it is."
- Marketplace on Oakton, Skokie
-- Submitted by Howie |
| posted by Ziggy @ 8:20 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
|
| Goth is no longer "different." |
(Goth kid with purple, red, green, and orange hair.)
Goth Kid: "What are you staring at?"
Suit: "You."
Goth Kid: "Why?"
Suit: "You have 4 hair colors. You're dressed in all black with a John Travolta caricature on your shirt. You have eye liner and lipstick on and your shoes are pink. I think I have a right to stare."
- Blue Line
-- Submitted by Crying Shame |
| posted by Ziggy @ 7:57 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
|
| Next time, slap yourself. |
Guy : (talking to woman with pregnant abdomen) "Oh! When are you expecting?"
Lady : "I just gave birth not too long ago"
Guy : "It stays big that way?"
Lady : "It takes a while to get smaller."
Guy : "It's so big. I've never seen that before."
- Evanston Whole Foods
-- Submitted by Grocery Patron |
| posted by Ziggy @ 7:53 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
| Thursday, July 20, 2006 |
| Girls excel at dirty talk |
Playa: "I was getting all into it to dude. Rachel is freaking hooooot."
Buddy: "So why the hell did you stop?"
Playa: "Well, we were getting into it, and after she goes down on me, she looks at me and says, 'Your turn.' So I get down there and she screams, 'Yeah, Baby! Suck my catling!' I started laughing so hard I had to leave."
- Northwestern Campus
-- Submitted by Wildcat |
| posted by Ziggy @ 8:46 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
|
| Next time, try an I-pod |
Guy: "I don't get it; I got him a skull as a graduation gift."
- #36 Broadway Bus
-- Submitted by Greg |
| posted by Ziggy @ 8:44 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
|
| If you're a parent, you'll agree. If not, wait until you are. |
Woman: "..and she cries that much? How do you put up with it?"
Mom: "I do everything by the book. Try and change her, feed her, hold her, play, sing, dance, put her in the car, anything I can think of."
Woman: "Does it work?"
Mom: "Sometimes. But I'll tell you this much: I understand shaken baby syndrome a lot better now."
- Purple Line
-- Submitted by Larry |
| posted by Ziggy @ 8:38 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
| Wednesday, July 19, 2006 |
| Stupider than people who trip over the bikes? |
Guy: "Look at that shit. They should not allow bikes to be on trains. Stupidest thing in the world."
Girl: "Why? People ride the bike to the train and then ride to where they have to go after they get off."
Guy: "Have you ever tripped on one of those? You don't even see them and then BAM! you're on the ground. I've torn ACL's tripping over those things."
Girl: "You tore your ACL falling off of a bike."
Guy: "Riding, tripping, you still fall down and hurt yourself."
- Purple Line
-- Submitted by Haji |
| posted by Ziggy @ 7:23 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
|
| Getting rough on Sesame Street |
(Large woman wearing a yellow, feather covered shirt walks by)
Guy: "Holy crap! What was that?"
Buddy: "Big Bird! What the hell happened to you!?"
- Millenium Park Grill
-- Submitted by Cretin |
| posted by Ziggy @ 7:16 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
|
| So has the freelancer. |
Girl: (on cell) "I've had better days. One of my freelancers committed suicide last night."
- Outside Union Station
-- Submitted by Candice and Echo |
| posted by Ziggy @ 7:14 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
| Tuesday, July 18, 2006 |
| Must be French |
Guy: (on cell) "If we just launched a frog bomb on their asses, they wouldn't know what the hell hit 'um."
- Evanston
-- Submitted by Crazy Larry |
| posted by Ziggy @ 9:11 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
|
| Because they always have fresh food. |
Walker: (on cell) "No way! You ever been to the 24 hour McDonald's on Cermak & Harlem? Talk about freshness. Ordered a quarter pounder and it was like a left over from yesterday."
- Loyola Campus
-- Submitted by Tattoo Freak |
| posted by Ziggy @ 9:08 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
|
| Ah, Starbucks. |
Barista: "Can I help the next person, please?"
Customer: "Yes. Half caf, no fat, 140 degree latte please."
Barista: "Excuse me?"
Customer: "Half caf, no fat, 140 degree latte please."
Next in Line: "Dumbass. Do you want coffee or a freaking thermometer?"
- Downtown Starbucks
-- Submitted by Nasty |
| posted by Ziggy @ 9:03 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
| Monday, July 17, 2006 |
| You're not Michael Knight! |
(Woman autostarts her car as she's walking up to it.)
Onlooker: "Oh my goodness! Does your car automatically start when you get close to it?"
Woman: "Yeah. It does. I'm driving KITT from Knight Rider."
- Highland Park Walker Bros.
-- Submitted by Bear |
| posted by Ziggy @ 7:49 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
|
| "Cubs logic" is so sad |
Cubs Fan #1: "...but if you took away that 6th inning, we would have won. On national TV!!!"
Cubs Fan #2: "You can't do that! If you took away the 6th? If you took away all the losses they'd be undefeated. If you took away all the runs scored against them, they'd have all shut outs. If they won every World Series from 1900 on we would have a 106 year WORLD SERIES STREAK YOU FUCKING IDIOT! I hate coming to games with you."
- Exiting Wrigley Field
-- Submitted by Dusty for President |
| posted by Ziggy @ 7:46 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
|
| His own man....with a black eye. |
Guy: (on cell) "I know. It's a problem. You're right. I don't listen to anybody; not even myself. It's like I punch my conscience in the face."
- Lake Michigan Beach
-- Submitted by Cowlie |
| posted by Ziggy @ 7:44 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
| Friday, July 14, 2006 |
| Hair-frying awesome |
Park Goer #1: "...and they said it was supposed to rain today."
Park Goer #2: "I hope not."
Park Goer #1: "They shut down almost everything when it rains, right?"
Park Goer #2: "Only if there's lightening, I think."
Park Goer #1: "They should find a way to incorporate the lightening into the rides. How awesome would that be?"
- Great America
-- Submitted by The Colonel |
| posted by Ziggy @ 7:36 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
|
| Self-deprecate much? |
Office Guy: "I'll be back. You sticking around?"
Self-Esteem King: "Yeah. I'll be the big, fat, Jewish guy sitting in my office."
- Chase Building
-- Submitted by Shnike |
| posted by Ziggy @ 7:34 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
|
| Bums making sense |
(One bum looks through trash as another looks on. First bum pulls out a cigarette carton.)
Bum #1: (holds up carton) "Please, please, PLEASE!"
Bum #2: "Please what?"
Bum #1: "I'm hopin' there's a cigarette in here."
Bum #2: "Who would throw away a carton before smoking all the smokes?"
Bum #1: "I used to."
Bum #2: "That's why you ain't got no cash. You're wasteful."
- Erie and Wells
-- Submitted by Carlos |
| posted by Ziggy @ 7:30 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
| Thursday, July 13, 2006 |
| More like Magellan |
World Traveller: "...but it's going real good. In fact, we're having a contest to see who does better, me or them. If they win, I'm taking them and their families on a trip. Probably to the Turks and Caicos.
Guy: "Turkish chaos? Where the hell is that?"
World Traveller: "Turks and Caicos. They're islands in the West Indies."
Guy: "The West Indies? Who are you, Columbus?"
- Near Belmont and Damen
-- Submitted by Demetri |
| posted by Ziggy @ 11:31 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
|
| Big, cuddly bear |
Lady: "Oh, you are not. I know you get all kinds of emotional."
Tough Guy: "No. Seriously. Unless it involves trauma to my children, I don't."
Lady: "Whatever. You're just a fluffy guy."
Tough Guy: "Yeah. Fluffly like a rock."
- State and Van Buren
-- Submitted by Creole |
| posted by Ziggy @ 11:26 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
|
| On rye bread with mustard.... |
Goth kid: "I like pigeons."
Punk kid: "Pigeons are just rats with wings!"
Goth kid: "...But I like rats."
- Millenium Park
-- Submitted by Elora |
| posted by Ziggy @ 11:23 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
| Wednesday, July 12, 2006 |
| You look like you have stupid |
Guy: "He's so easily offended. I was like, 'Dude, you look like you have AIDS!' I mean, he totally looks like he has AIDS. And he was, like, so pissed at me. Isn't that lame?"
Girl: "Totally."
- DePaul University Student Center
-- Submitted by Cassie |
| posted by Ziggy @ 7:28 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
|
| This kid gets it. |
(Kid running around wearing a cape and goggles.)
Nice Old Lady: "Aren't you adorable?! Are you supposed to be Superman?"
Kid: "No."
Nice Old Lady: "Batman?"
Kid: "No."
Nice Old Lady: "Then why are you wearing a cape and goggles, dear?"
Kid: "Because I can."
- Millenium Park
-- Submitted by Shmark |
| posted by Ziggy @ 7:24 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
|
| If they take out the turkey, cheese, and veggie's, it'll be even skinnier. |
Sandwich Maker: "What can I get you?"
Blonde: "Can I have a skinny turkey and a turkey on wheat with provalone? How do you make it 'skinny?'''
Sandwich maker: "Remove some bread."
Blonde: "How do you do that?"
- Lincoln Square Potbelly's
-- Submitted by Crazybeautiful |
| posted by Ziggy @ 7:20 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
| Tuesday, July 11, 2006 |
| Like rain? |
Crazy Guy: (boards train and screams) "RAIN SUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCKS!!!!! That is all."
- Red Line
-- Submitted by Clickson |
| posted by Ziggy @ 7:47 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
|
| Sometimes, you should leave it to the pros. |
Handyman: "...it just didn't seem that hard when I saw them do it on TV."
Buddy: "Look, dude. It isn't easy, but you need to know what you're doing. It can get tricky."
Handyman: "I know, but demolishing stuff seemed easy enough. I wasn't going to do everything myself."
Buddy: "So what's the damage?"
Handyman: "Well, I was going to save about $3,000 doing it myself. Because I screwed up the walls and floors so bad, it's going to cost me $5,000 to have it fixed."
Buddy: "Your wife is going to divorce you, you know."
- Red Line
-- Submitted by Jason |
| posted by Ziggy @ 7:36 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
|
| Harsh |
Dude #1: "I feel grimy."
Dude #2: "Great."
Dude #1: "I think I need to take a bath."
Dude #2: "Fag."
- Orange Line
-- Submitted by City Street |
| posted by Ziggy @ 7:30 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
| Monday, July 10, 2006 |
| Restaurants don't have ferris wheels. |
Woman: "...if the Taste were here all year round, I would be the happiest person in the world."
Passerby: "The Taste is here all year round. It's called going to a restaurant, idiot."
- Taste of Chicago
-- Submitted by Butter |
| posted by Ziggy @ 8:16 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
|
| Reasoning is FINALLY coming back |
Parent: "and they keep banning all the games we used to play. What the hell are kids going to do?"
Other Parent: "Yeah, it is getting pretty pathetic. Kids DO get hurt, but thats kids."
Parent: "The only thing that's going to be left for them to do is watch TV, but that's bad for them, too. Soon the only activity they're going to be able to do for fun is sit in bed and stare at a wall. I'd say read a book, but they may get paper cuts."
- Taste of Chicago
-- Submitted by Carol |
| posted by Ziggy @ 8:03 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
|
| Touche |
Guy: "I would give ANYTHING for a million dollars."
Friend: "Bullshit."
Guy: "Seriously. What wouldn't I give?"
Friend: "Two million dollars."
- Taste of Chicago
-- Submitted by Donnie |
| posted by Ziggy @ 7:54 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
| Friday, July 07, 2006 |
| Proof that you can be too involved in your kids' life |
Office Guy: "I'm telling you, potty training the kid has been nerve racking."
Office Mate: "But it's going well, right?"
Office Guy: "Yeah. But I think I'm pushing for it too much."
Office Mate: "How's that?"
Office Guy: "When I got home from work yesterday, I told my wife I had to go poopy in the potty. I felt like a total douchebag."
- AT&T/SBC Building
-- Submitted by Smooth Operator |
| posted by Ziggy @ 7:49 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
|
| Kids: Getting stupider. |
Boy #1: "That's a funny name. Tut."
Boy #2: "Yeah. His parents must have been idiots."
Boy #1: "They should have named him something cool."
Boy #2: "Yeah. Like 'dude." Then we would have been King Dude."
Boy #1: "Awesome."
- Field Museum
-- Submitted by Claire |
| posted by Ziggy @ 7:45 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
|
| So you two are breaking up? |
Guy: (on cell) "Just hear me out. No. Listen. Listen to me. Hear what I have to say. Just listen. Please. Listen. (pause) (screams) BITCH!"
- Taste of Chicago
-- Submitted by Daphne |
| posted by Ziggy @ 7:43 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
| Thursday, July 06, 2006 |
| Loving mother. |
Lady: "I think I should move, but I don't know how many bedrooms I want."
Friend: "Get three. One for you and one for both your kids."
Lady: "But they're going to leave for college soon. "
Friend: "So you'll be an empty nester. You can have an office and a guest room."
Lady: "Are you nuts? My kids are going to end up moving back in with me. Who the hell is going to hire those two numbskulls."
- Taste of Chicago
-- Submitted by Jackee |
| posted by Ziggy @ 9:34 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
|
| I almost didn't post this, but I did. |
Guy: (on cell) "No, I'm downtown. I almost missed the train, but I didn't."
Bum: "That's like saying I almost have a house, but I don't."
- Boeing Building
-- Submitted by Jaycee |
| posted by Ziggy @ 9:32 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
|
| More effective than Raid. |
Lady Lawyer: "...you should TOTALLY buy my house, Cindy! We're moving to Bartlett anyway. We'll give you a great price."
Male Suit Friend: "Yeah, Cindy. Then we can hang out on weekends, too!"
Cindy: "No. I can't afford it."
Male Suit Friend: "Come on, Cindy. Unlike your house, this one hasn't been on fire!"
Cindy: "It got rid of all the carpenter ants, didn't it?"
- Metra Milwaukee District North Line
-- Submitted by Erica |
| posted by Ziggy @ 9:24 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
| Wednesday, July 05, 2006 |
| U.S.A.! U.S.A.! U.S.A.! |
(Fireworks conductor speaking with an Irish accent)
Angry Drunk Guy: "Why is there a god damn Irish guy runnin' this show? I WANT AN AMERICAN, DAMNIT!"
- Taste of Chicago
-- Submitted by Maria |
| posted by Ziggy @ 7:11 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
|
| Must be a rocket scientist |
Guy: "I'm telling you, those aren't the fireworks we're looking for."
Girl: "Yeah they are. They're pretty much in the area where they're supposed to be."
Guy: "No they aren't. They're going to be pretty much in front of us."
Girl: "Maybe they're shooting them sideways this year."
- Near Harrer Park in Morton Grove
-- Submitted by Teela |
| posted by Ziggy @ 7:09 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
|
| Give him 2 dollars and you get both |
Bum: (selling candy bars) "C'mon lady, one dollar for these here candy bars so I have enough to get out of town."
Teen girl: "No thanks."
Bum: "Baby, it's only a dollar! I need this money so I won't get caught by no po po!"
Teen girl: "How about you keep your candy and I just GIVE you a dollar to leave me the fuck alone."
- Blue Line
-- Submitted by Maria |
| posted by Ziggy @ 7:07 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
| Monday, July 03, 2006 |
| Taste of Chicago...'s wallets |
Guy: "...and I can't believe I keep coming back here."
Girl: "Come on. It's fun. There's food, music, people, the lake. And we're not at work."
Guy: "If I was at work, there would be a radio, coworkers, and a view of the lake. As for food, I could pay less than seven dollars for a 'taste' of pizza and expense it later!"
- Taste of Chicago
-- Submitted by Amy |
| posted by Ziggy @ 7:12 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
|
| Camera Shy |
Woman: (pointing at another couple) "See, George, not EVERYONE forgets to bring a camera."
George: "I DON'T WANT TO TAKE ANYMORE GOD DAMN PICTURES WITH YOU."
- Chicago Botanical Gardens
-- Submitted by Hervina |
| posted by Ziggy @ 6:56 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
|
| Pinpointing the exact start of a downfall |
Crazy homeless lady: "Where did I go wrong? Why has this happened to me?"
Girl behind her: "I'm pretty sure it started wit yo nappy ass weave!"
- State and Madison
-- Submitted by Leah |
| posted by Ziggy @ 6:50 AM Del.icio.us Digg it! |
|
|
|
|
|
| By submitting a dialogue to this web site, you are granting the site an unlimited right to republish the dialogue in any online or printed form. This right is semi-exclusive, retained also by the eavesdropper and the speakers of the dialogue. |
| About Me |
Name: Ziggy
Home: Morton Grove, Illinois, United States
About Me:
See my complete profile
|
| Important Links |
| |
