Football Fan: "...are you in or not?"
Friend: "I don't think so, I just don't have the time."
Football Fan: "Time?! Dude, I'm in 21 fantasy leagues and I have 15 more to draft for. You MAKE time."
Friend: "I'd rather spend time with my wife."
Football Fan: "Forget that. For the next 6 months, my wife is dead to me. Football is my woman now."
-- Submitted by Winter